Dating dynamics podcast


They were afraid they would be rejected out of hand, or made fun of.And they, too, were afraid of being trapped into being with someone who was undesirable.Meetings in bars happened from time to time, but were considered somewhat dangerous—at least by the women. Colleges became co-ed, and young people were thrown together informally, making it easy to meet someone of the opposite sex. Instead of couples marrying in their early twenties, they married later.Often men and women graduated college without yet entering into a serious, let alone permanent, relationship.



Back in those days—before computers, or portable phones, or, even, electric typewriters—the rules were different.These precautions seemed less important after the first few times a woman responded to these published invitations to meet.It turned out the men they were introduced to this way were no more or less dangerous than men encountered for the first time in a bar, or even men whom they met through the recommendation of a friend. (A somewhat older, recently divorced, woman told me she was sitting with her date at a fancy restaurant when he took out his teeth and put them in a wine glass.)Being pro-active, as I usually am, I encouraged men and women, too, to try dating this way, although, certainly, only after taking reasonable precautions.In another time and place, matchmakers would have been called upon to make the necessary arrangements; but no such social institution existed here in this country.